6 Hard Truths About Life As An Expat

The term “expat” is short for “expatriate”, someone that has moved from their native country to another country permanently or for an extended period of time — thank you dictionary.com. It seems like these days everybody is some sort of “content creator” or “digital nomad”, which allows them to hop from one country to the next while working online and becoming expats wherever they choose. They post these beautiful photos that fill your Instagram feed with gorgeous Mediterranean sunsets from an infinity pool and captions along the lines of “Today’s work views! #digitalnomadlife”. We’ve all seen it and we’ve all envied it.

But as we know, life isn’t always what it seems. I have been an expat for almost two years now and have learned to come to terms with some of the hard truths of life as an expat that aren’t shown on social media. So before you decide to take the leap and join this expat community yourself, here are a few you should know:

It’s Not a Vacation, It’s Real Life

First things first, life as an expat isn’t a vacation or an attempt at avoidance of “real life” — it is real life. It isn’t all fun and games. You still have bills to pay and an income to be made, but you just have the option of doing so poolside in a foreign country. Social media can make expat life look like a vacation, however, it is important to remember that you are only seeing a curated version of expat life and it isn’t as glamorous as it seems.

Friends and Family Will Never Fully Understand Your Life

Friends and family will constantly be asking you, “When are you coming home?”. I get asked this question at least once a week even though I have have been living abroad for almost two years. It can be a frustrating question to always be asked because it feels as if they don’t understand that you are not on vacation and that this is your life now (see first truth above). It’s as if where you are in the world could never be your new home, even if you feel like it is where you really belong. Although your friends and family may not fully understand this new life you have created, you will meet new people who definitely do as they are in the same expat boat with you. 

New Friends May Not Be In Your Life for Long

Making friends in a new country is definitely hard, but the hardest part about it is that your new friends will likely not be in your life for long. As the expat and digital nomad life become more and more popular amongst the adventurous, it has become the norm in this bubble to live in a place for a few months and then move on to your next destination. You will meet so many amazing people during your expat journey, some people may be in your life for a month or if your lucky at least a year or two. It just comes with the lifestyle.    

You Will Miss Big Things at Home

This is definitely one of the hardest truths to face when you decide to embark on your life abroad. There are some things you never thought you would miss because you could always fly home and be there for those moments. But then a pandemic hits and new travel restrictions prevent you from being there. Just in these past few months, I have missed my brother’s college graduation, my sister’s engagement, and my best friend’s wedding. Watching your friend you grew up with walk down the aisle via Zoom is not something you want to do, but it is something that is part of the expat life reality. 

You Realize How Little You Need

This is a truth that I have now (kind of) embraced but had a hard time coming to terms with at first. Once you start packing your bags to move abroad you will take a critical look at the material items that truly hold value to you. It’s hard to fit your life into 1-2 suitcases, I would have preferred to pack a LOT more, but it is possible. I went from having at least 10 different boots to wear at home to now just having 1 pair because that’s all I could pack. I also went from shopping every weekend to now never shopping because I would have nowhere to fit my new clothes in my suitcase. Once you embrace your new expat lifestyle, you really realize how little you actually need in life.

You Can Be Your True Self

This was something that was really strange for me. I suppose I didn’t move abroad to change who I was, I just wanted more life experiences and to see more of the world than my 12 vacation days a year allowed. But once I landed I realized, nobody knows me here and nobody knows anything about me. 

I think that when you live in your native country and meet fellow natives for the first time they can jump to conclusions about who you are as a person based on the information you provide them with. They can make assumptions about you based on the college you went to, the job you have, the company you work at, where you grew up, etc. But for people who are not from your native country, all of that information is useless because they know nothing about that stuff. Although this type of information doesn’t define you as a person, it is so refreshing to feel like you have a clean slate and can be your true self abroad.

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